Trimming My Bush Mom Humour
SAHM, Stay-at-home-mom, Uncategorized, Writing

Trimming My Bush – Rant

This morning marks three weeks since my bushes were trimmed.

Every day I can see less and less and besides that, there’s a principle here.

This is a task that is normally carried out by the gardeners employed by our body corporate – a service we pay for. I have been trying to ignore it and give them the benefit of the doubt; maybe they just forgot; maybe they didn’t see because the car was parked in the way. Then yesterday they came past mowing the lawn, weeding, etc but still they neglected my bushes.

Obviously I’m referring to the ones growing outside my kitchen window – really! Get your mind out the gutter please?

At 07.30 this morning I’d had enough and was about to sms the groundskeeper and complain. I was drafting the sms in my head. The options went something like this:

It’s been three weeks since my bush was trimmed … (Discarded – try again)

Please would you send someone to trim my bush … (Discarded – try again)

I’m trimming my bush, please can you send a team to tidy up … (Discarded again)

At that point I was embarrassing myself.

I took the hedge trimmers and hacked at the offensive bushes myself.

The garden service team will be round later today so I will ask them face to face to clean up the mess for me – using as few words as possible!

Is it too early for puns?

Have a good day everyone!


R is for Hoppit
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25 thoughts on “Trimming My Bush – Rant”

  1. Haha! I think the answer is not to have, er, shrubbery (phew, I dodged that unfortunate sentence) – there is clearly no way to maintain it that isn’t going to result in embarrassing conversations!

    Thanks so much for joining us for #FridayFrolics

    Liked by 1 person

  2. LOL!!!
    This happens a LOT more than you may believe. I have heard some brilliant ones…
    “There is something wrong with my bush… Do you think you could poke it and see what’s wrong with it?”
    That was a one that caused a snigger or two.

    Another good one… Cheeky housewives that put their foot in it can be funny too.
    We were working on a garden and the rather pretty neighbour leaned over the fence and said “You’re doing a grand job there, lad. When you are done you can pop over and do me… Mine…. My garden… You can cut my grass!”
    At which point she went in with a VERY red faced. Methinks she was thinking of things. B-)

    But gardeners do appreciate a well trimmed bush.
    BTW… Try ‘shrub’ in future. B-)

    Liked by 1 person

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