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Spacing Your Kids

The age gap between my girls is 23 months apart. When we went for the first scan the Dr actually told us the baby was due on her sister’s birthday. Cue ALL the jokes about “Do you guys only do ‘it’ once a year?” – that got tired real quick! πŸ˜‚

Actually, if I had gotten pregnant as soon as we started trying for number two it would have been a lot closer, but clearly God knew what he was doing because we had to wait 10 months before I conceived my youngest. I know many many people have children a lot closer than my two are, but I really did struggle to cope with two littles for the first two years. I am not ashamed to admit it.

That said,Β I love my girls and I wouldn’t change a thing. Okay, that’s a lie. But moving on and accepting my lot in life, here is a list of what I love about the fact that they are only 23 months apart:

  • They are close enough in age to have shared interests in terms of toys, TV programmes, friends, etc. and can play together and occupy each other when forced to, isn’t that half the reason to have a second child – company for each other?
  • Their birthday’s are close enough that ‘hand-me-down’ clothes are seasonally relevant for the younger child, if they make it (I’m referring to the clothes).
  • I only spent 4 years in nappy hell – you know the place where you feel like all you do is wipe your kids’ butts & throw sh*t covered money in the bin to add to the pollution of the planet … those years – I am grateful there were only four consecutive years of this phase. I really don’t think I’d have coped if I’d had to stop and then start again a few years later.
  • Pre-Loved baby apparatus such as Β car-seats, push chairs, bottle warmers etc … there wasn’t really enough time in those nearly two years to reinvent mothering enough for me to have to buy all new equipment in case my latest child was no longer safe in the equipment the elder one survived quite fine in, so it’s almost like an investment for the future when you buy the first time round.
  • You’re not really out of the trenches that going back in for round two feels too traumatic, it’s like memory-fat – your body and mind just slip back into it without even really needing to adjust. No, it’s not as fun or exciting, but you have your ‘body memory’ to see you through it.

Here is a list of what is NOT good about about having them less than two years apart!

  • They might play together nicely when it suits them, but they’re actually only whispering to each other to lull you into a false sense of security before they erupt into World War 3 over who snatched who’s Barbie shoe without asking!
  • Hand-me-downs only work if your younger child is in the ‘idolising her big sister’ stage at the time you re-introduce the ‘new’ clothes. Either she will love it and feel special, or … if her sister’s being a vindictive little brat to her … she might refuse to wear it! Especially if the older child teases the younger child about her having new clothes while they younger child gets old clothes. You can’t explain to a 3 year old that any item of clothing that survived the ‘threenager’ phase of her older sister, is to be treasured, honored, revered, or even put in the box labelled “She hated it and never wore it because it had fairies on it, not pixies – stupid woman! What were you thinking?”
  • Their birthday’s are too blady close! 3 weeks! You’re therefore broke for 2 months, and have to deal with 2 x all of it! ALL. OF. IT: The actual birthDAY, the school party DAY, and the party DAY!
  • Heaven help you if you were foolish enough for your younger child to be born earlier in the year than your elder child. In my case, the younger is born in mid June, the older is born in early July! That means that for around 3 months prior to the youngest birthday, the elder will despair daily about how life is so unfair, she’s so hard done by and no one loves her! Then the 3 weeks between the two will be filled with the elder rubbing it in the youngest’s face about how it’s her birthday in 3 weeks, and the younger has to wait “a whole year” before her next birthday! (FYI – Girls are b*tches)!

I’ll just leave this one right here:

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Pic courtesy of Fowl Language Comics.Β http://www.fowllanguagecomics.com


diaryofanimperfectmum
Life Love and Dirty Dishes
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29 thoughts on “Spacing Your Kids”

  1. Lol! There is 25 months between my two and I love it too. I absolutely agree with your list. And yes one minute they are all lovely kissing and hugging and playing nicely the next its like they are the worse of enemies. Thank you for sharing with #StayClassyMama

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I have 3 kids my 2 youngest are 23 months apart also but are a boy and girl . My daughter is the youngest of the 2 . She is 9 and he is 11 they act like an old married couple on the verge of divorce .
    Great post , made me laugh out loud .

    Liked by 1 person

  3. LMAO…love it! All so relevant! and true! Mothering is HARD! I found the 3yr gap between my eldest was really great. My daughter was a star older sister, until she hit about 6yrs old. Now that they’re older..8 and 5, oh goodness..the bickering NEVER ENDS!

    I don’t care about trendy or seasonal…I saved all middle child’s clothing and at this stage, the almost 2yr old has literally gotten almost ZERO new clothing. That will be his lot in life unfortunately. Thankfully for now he’s too young to take this in. lol

    So will you ever become a ‘mom of 3’ or has that ship sailed?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That ship sailed! We made double certain of that in January last year! My moto: 2 hands, 2 kids, and even that is hard! lol
      I heard that transitioning from 1 to 2 is harder than adding more after that. I’m not really prepared to take the chance! lol

      Like

      1. People told me 2 to 3 is so easy….. load of BS! It’s bloody hard. Like you say, only sets of hands…lol. I personally found 1 to 2 not so bad, but I think my 2 eldest were really easy kids. This last one…heaven help me…..

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I actually just laughed out loud hard at how you ended your post today about girls being bitches! Thanks for the laugh! I have a friend who has three daughters and a friend who has three sons and there is a HUGE difference in their lives. Both chaotic, but the girl side of life is definitely a cattier, bitchier place for sure! Oddly enough, the mom with daughters drinks more wine than the one with sons. Coincidence? haha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ – same dad! Love it! Just read your pregnancy announcement post! I may have chosen a new dad the second time around! 😘

      Like

  5. Ha ha I sympathise! My three are all two years apart and my youngest two DO share a birthday. But get this, they were both born at 37 and 6 days!! Oh we get all the jokes for sure! Oh and expensive – yes! My husband’s birthday falls on the day before so it really is like Christmas that week! But, I wouldn’t change it for the world because yes it was hard when they were small but they really are the best of friends these days (well most of the time!) #ablogginggoodtime

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My nearly 6 year old cried yesterday because she doesn’t want a baby sister – who is 4! You can’t win – no matter what you do. lol

      Liked by 1 person

  6. My boys are five years apart but their birthdays are only within a month of each other and they’re both right around the holidays so from Thanksgiving until tax time I’m broke, lol. My oldest is right before or right after Thanksgiving, depending on the year and my youngest is right between Christmas and New Year’s.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. As a mom of twins, I am always told that I have it harder that any other parents except for higher order multiple’s. The truth is…it’s easier! My hat goes off to parents of children close in age. Multiplies do most things within a few weeks or months of each other (which means mommy is only super stressed for smaller periods of time). For all you parents with kids close in age…you have the harder parenting. Children at different stages means shifting gears in your parenting on a dime and sleep deprived. The stress with multiples didn’t really come until school, and that is just because of the myth of twins! You are doing a great job! Keep it real!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Lol I love the cartoon! It’s true, birthdays are EXHAUSTING, two of mine are two weeks apart but fortunately the older one comes first and also one is a boy and the other a girl so there is less competition. My four kids are all two years apart (totally not planned in any way) and they all have such different relationships with one another. Having a boy in the middle somewhere adds a mischievous dynamic! The youngest two girls are great playmates, it’s lovely to watch. I would love my kids to have close adult relationships when they grow up, I do with my own siblings and it is the most special bond in the world.

    Liked by 1 person

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